The Peter Pan of Hillaryland

For some reason, the Washington Post cranked out a five-page profile of Philippe Reines, Hillary Clinton’s current deputy assistant secretary for strategic communications. That's a long-winded way of saying he's Hillary's flack. Reines (pronounced RYE-ness) has been with Clinton since her senate days. Described both as a "self-promoting 41-year-old bachelor" and the "Peter Pan of Hillaryland," the Post said Reines is part DC's "dysfunctional family of politicos, operatives, staffers, reporters, TV bookers, media types, government officials and frosted society scenesters. And he bears some of their less appealing traits: an addiction to background dish, media recognition and proximity to power." In 2004, he celebrated his birthday by papering the house of a friend with "photocopied clips of his own quotes." In 2007, he mounted a secret e-mail campaign to win a “Hottest Media Types” contest - and got busted. His passion in life? Guarding Hillary’s political image, he told the Post. He gets dates when the women in his cross-hairs finally tire of saying no to him. In short, Reines is a legend in his own mind. And the point of the profile? Beats me. I lost interest after page two. I do, however, have some advice: If you see this guy coming your way, hide your daughters. You're welcome.