What's on NatGeo tonight? You don't want to know.

Vulgarity knows no bounds on cable TV. That isn't news. What is news (to me, at least) is how much of it appears on the National Geographic Channel, the "Inglourious Basterd" child of the august National Geographic Society. Like the Discovery Channel ("MythBusters: Can You Dodge a Real Bullet?"), no show is too titillating or gross to broadcast in the race to the bottom of entertainment fare. Yes, the NG Channel offers quality programming, too. But it's clear which shows are paying the bills.

Like a scene from Masterpiece Theater, one can imagine the hushed talk in the wood-paneled Map Room at the Society's DC headquarters. The awful family "secret" is out. "I heard it escaped the 'nunnery' on its own," said a NG photojournalist, staring into his steaming Earl Grey. "I doubt it, old boy," replied the arctic adventurer-in-residence. "It must have had help from those vile marketeers." The famed photog steepled his fingers. "Those people," he said. "Quite." "It calls itself NatGeo now, you know."

Indeed, it does. NatGeo boasts that it is "your home for the best animals, nature, history, science, engineering, people, places, and exploration content" on television. As showcased on its webpage, it all looks inviting -- until you kick over the rock and expose the icky things wiggling beneath it. Tonight, for example, there are back-to-back episodes of something called "Humanly Possible." At 9pm you can watch "A man who is capable of eating glass." At 10, "A man is rolled over by a truck." And at 11, don't miss how someone "survives a million volts of electricity." Oh goody: Suicidal behavior and sadomasicism. What's not to like? I wonder what NatGeo is planning for next season? The "Joys of Waterboarding," perhaps?

To say this is appalling is being much too kind. Clearly, NatGeo is giving its audience -- presumably Very Special freaks -- what they want. And that says more about our culture than the media complex that feeds its worst impulses.