Are you a lefty snob?

Did you go to a really good (even prestigious) university? Are you into yoga, pilates, skiing or mountain biking, but have no idea what MMA (mixed martial arts) is? Are you married to a college grad or live where there lots of them? Never read a Left Behind novel? Do you love "Mad Men” but never watch "The Price Is Right?

Know who Oprah is but never watch her show? Like backpacking the Sierra Nevada but just not into RVs. Love that B&B overlooking Boothbay Harbor, but wouldn't be caught dead on a cruise ship? Not a member of a Rotary or Kiwanis Club, you say? Or ever lived in a small town? (your ivy-covered college doesn't count) And shockingly, you've never even heard of Branson, MO?

Then you, my noble friends, are despicable members of America’s new elite. Pthu! And “a plague a' both your houses!”

That is the crux of Charles Murray’s superficial and, well, appalling op-ed in this morning’s Washington Post. The only thing missing at its conclusion is Marlon Brando’s Kurtz apocalyptically whispering, “The horror. The horror.” Read it here.

There is of course a granule of truth in the charge that some liberals (okay, most liberals) condescend toward the less enlightened among the right, with high-profile pundits like Keith Olbermann and funnyman Jon Stewart gleefully leading the charge.

But it is also true that too many conservatives take anti-intellectualist and/or irrational stances on evolution, Mosque-building, climate change and Obama’s citizenship/religion that make condescension all too easy. To reword John Houseman’s famous catchphrase, they make stupidity the old fashion way, they earn it.

One last thing: What the heck is Branson, MO? Inquiring liberal elite minds want to know. I’m afraid I had to ask The Google. It said: Branson, Missouri is the "Live Music Show Capital of the World," according to the official website.

Well, shut my mouth, honey child. I had no ideeah. And now I got me this strange urge to thump a bible, protest Starbucks, rent a Winnebago, watch the “Price is Right” and cling to mah gun – right after catchin’ me some live NASCAR. Burp!

Oh, by the way, Charles Murray, 67, is a 1965 graduate of über elite Harvard University and proud owner of a PhD from über elite MIT. So, take that, you latte-swilling, pilate-loving, effete liberal snobs. Oh wait … 

--------------------

BONUS: Does the name Murray ring a "bell"? It ought to. Murray was co-author of the controversial book The Bell Curve (1994) in which he discusses the role of IQ in American society. Ding! Yeah, that Murray. And let’s just say the book’s insights didn’t sit well with most folks inside or outside elite circles, including some on the right. He’s currently a fellow at the American Enterprise Institute, the über conservative think tank in Washington.