Thursday, November 17, 2011

Hunka hunka burning bunker-busting love

It's no surprise that the products of Boeing Co. ― one of Southern California's largest employers ― frequently grace the pages of the Los Angeles Times. Still, the LAT's piece about the aerospace firm's new 30,000-pound bomb had a weird Dr. Strangelovian vibe to it. The weapon, called the Massive Ordnance Penetrator, is designed to ravage deeply buried targets that heretofore hoped to remain chastely hidden (think Iranian nuclear complexes). I'll leave it to you to ponder the not so subtle phallic allusions. (The only thing missing from the above illustration is a whooping and hollering Slim Pickens riding the weapon down to its intended target.) Packing a wallop ― i.e., 5,300 pounds of high-explosives ― the GPS-guided, 20-foot long shaft of righteous destruction is 10 times more powerful than its predecessor. If you're on the receiving end, this "hunka hunka burning bunker-busting love" will definitely ruin your day. The LAT reports that the U.S. Air Force took delivery of the first batch of Penetrators in September. Trust me: It is no coincidence that this news comes only a week after a UN agency said Iran is secretly hell-bent on building nukes. Think of the revelation as a strategic love note from President Obama to President Ahmadinejad that reads: "Just thinking of you." Hopefully, the Iranian despot will get the message before "Elvis" leaves the building.

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