Slipping the noose

File this one under "gossip," courtesy of POLITICO. Apparently, Jack McCain, the 25-year-old son of Sen. John McCain, is breaking off his six-month romance with some hot babe named Julia Allison. Rest assured, there’s no scandal here: Jack, a naval officer, is single and Julia (also single) is – or was – his girlfriend. Politico describes Ms. Allison, 30, as a “media personality.” Yep, I have no idea what that means either, but it doesn’t sound promising. For example: Given Jack’s high profile (thanks to his lineage), one would think Julia would keep this matter private and go quietly into that good night. Instead, she penned a 1,209-word post on her blog with all of the syrupy details about the break-up (“I am heartbroken … because I loved him”). Written in the prose of a bad romance novel, women will weep and savor every word of it. Guys (and especially Jack) will simultaneously guffaw and cringe. I only got as far as the fourth paragraph before I did. I can only imagine the merciless ribbing Jack is getting as his ship steams west toward Guam, his new post. Another tip-off about Julia is her blog’s slogan: “I wish I had a British accent so everything I said would sound smart. Instead I was born in Chicago.” Okey-dokey. Clearly, it’s all about her. It may have taken young McCain six months to connect the dots, but his “command decision” to bail before things got out of hand appears sound. Bro, you just dodged a bullet. Well played.