I Like, Therefore I Am

So I was reading about Rep. Gabby Giffords at the Arizona Republic today when I spied this sidebar headline: "Skinny Snooki Shows Off Her Bod at Her 24th Birthday in Vegas." The good news is that these two stories are completely unrelated. (Never mind why a link to Snooki's latest antics appear anywhere near a story about Giffords.) The bad news is that the "Skinny Snooki" teaser broke my concentration. Even worse, I clicked on the link. Sadly, I couldn't help it. The gravitational pull of sexy celebrity gossip is akin to that of a black hole: Resistance is futile, baby, so abandon hope all ye who enter anywhere near here. Anyway, I arrived at some website called Wetpaint Entertainment featuring a slideshow that promised to show me titillating photos of Ms. Polizzi's new bod. Having slipped into a slack-jawed trance, I began to click through the pics to sate my curiosity. Then, at slide no. 3, the way forward was rudely blocked by a pop-up which declared: "LIKE US! To Continue Viewing This Gallery and Get the Latest Updates on your Favorite Shows!" You gotta be kidding me, I thought. It was like getting mugged at gunpoint: Click here to "Like Us," sucka -- or else. Having been punked, I snapped out of my trance, refused to "Like" them, and sheepishly retraced my steps back to the Republic's Giffords story. I don't want to overstate it, but there is something vaguely pathetic about the omnipresent Facebook culture and the groupthink it promotes: I Like, Therefore I Am. On the other hand, this cultural observation ignores the real question for the ages: Did Snooki really lose weight?